Opinion: Lauren Boebert co-groping at Beetlejuice

‘Conservative’ Groping Is Private In The Dark

One word: Higher Education

Lucy M.
3 min readSep 22


Photo by Milan Malkomes on Unsplash

It was business as usual at the GOP when one of their h*rny GED graduates got kicked out of a theater for screaming, vaping, and generating a literal hurricane of public annoyance and disturbance.

The Party’s continued assault on all remaining shreds of “moderate” conservatism has indeed been brazen.

Lauren Boebert is the intellectual lightweight and moral back — bencher in question. Her ascension through the ranks is another clear sign that the Republican Party is dominated by a blatant strain of actual trash.

She’s patterned her entire life out of the movie Mean Girls, and as such, her successes would make her a GOP favorite;

Photo Credit: The Denver Post

Born in Florida to welfare dependents. Registered as a Democrat at 19 years of age and currently makes a living despising everything she was.

Colorado’s state attorney general’s Office opened an investigation into Boebert, citing reports that she’d inflated the mileage she was reimbursed for during her congressional campaign and used funds from donors to pay off a $20,000 tax lien.

Boebert has also been charged with third-degree assault, criminal mischief, and underage drinking. According to one police report, she’s been charged with careless driving and operating an unsafe vehicle.

She’s failed to appear in court which resulted in a warrant being issued for her arrest.

Co-groping in a public theater.

I could go on and on, but I’d rather spend the next two minutes highlighting something more useful; the importance of higher education.

Photo Credit: KVDR

Why Do Conservatives Hate Higher Education

Lauren Boebert is a poor reflection of the levels of academic achievements that are possible in this country. Infrared? Night vision cameras? No idea? Really?

She’s understandably never set foot in a college classroom and is probably yet to have a two-way conversation with a college-educated someone.

How else could she have found out that camera technology is the primary driver of most security systems than by losing her congressional seat?

It’s permanently clear from here on out, that a lack of higher education is not a clear purchase on reality, and nor is the pursuit of higher education liberal indoctrination.

If critical thinking means disbelieving, then Lauren Boebert is not an aberration that will soon need to be excised.



Lucy M.

Lover of the occasional burger, but mostly politics. Let’s Connect.